7 Things Every Gay Should Take On A Date

Here are a few suggestions or tips, on what to take with you on a date. (These dating tips are in no particular order…).

1. Your humor – A must. Guys don’t want to go out with sour-pusses.

2. Condoms and lube. You never know, but it’s best to be prepared. Personally, I try to refrain from sex on the first date, as I’ve found it helpful to make the guy wait – Drive him crazy with anticipation.

3. Wear clean, neat, tidy and appropriate clothes. It’s really amazing just how many guys think they can get away with dirty underwear, shoes that are falling apart, or looking like a construction worker when they go to a really fancy restaurant. Take pride in your appearance.

4. A couple of questions or topics that you can talk about or use as conversation starters or conversation bridges.

5. Breath mints – Keep your breath fresh and pleasant please.

6. Pen & Paper – I rarely go anywhere without these; great for jotting down and exchanging email addresses, phone numbers, Instant Message handles, websites…

7. Emergency money. Long ago, I learned the value of taking change with me for pay phones. If you get in a bind you can call a friend or a relative. Of course if you’ve got a cell phone – even better. Just remember to turn it off so that you’re paying attention to your date and not to all those people who just have to call you. I’ve also found it helpful to carry enough cash to pay for at least my portion of any meal – even if I’ve been told that “it’s on him”.

Wishing you joy and success on your dates,

Gay Chat Rooms

Gay chat rooms, Some guys love them, others loathe them. I’ll admit that I haven’t been active in the chat rooms for a few years. However, before I set about to writing this article I decided to cruise by a few chat rooms to see what the scoop is these days… Nothing much has really changed since my chat days; which could be a good thing or not.

Chat rooms can be a good way to meet new guys. Sometimes these virtual meetings and hookups can actually lead to meeting guys in the flesh. I’ve actually made it that far a couple of times. Where things go from there, well, that’s up to you and the guy you happen to meet with.

More often than not though, chat rooms tend to be a good place for a virtual quickie, or a good place to just socialize and chat with someone new about anything or nothing in particular. In my experience and observations, the emphasis tends to be on the virtual quickies and the hunt for virtual quickies.

Timing is everything — I’ve been to chat rooms that are totally crowded and rocking. When I went back a day later — the same room would be totally dead. It all depends on the time of day or night, just how active the chat room will be and where in the world the guys are chatting from.

By the way, most of the dating services that I recommend have chat rooms for their members. The chat rooms tend to be text based chat rooms were it’s one big free for all, with the ability to create a little private room for one-on-one text chats. Some also offer one-on-one video chat services.

One of the things that I’ve noticed lately about the various portals that offer chat rooms is that in order to participate fully or to be able to use the full range of features that the site uses, prospective members are encouraged to upgrade their free chat accounts to a paid account.

In fact, at MSN chat, which had quite a number of gay chat rooms, it doesn’t look like free members can do anything anymore other than lurk in the corner and watch people chat. You hd got to upgrade to a premium chat account which happens to also give you a premium Hotmail account.

One of the reasons that the chat room providers are starting to charge money is to help cut down on the spammers who like to do fly by advertising in chat rooms. Chat rooms tend to be really expensive to run too as they use a lot of bandwidth and processes.

In any event, I’ve been out collecting links to gay chat rooms, which I’ll list here. I’m working on a more comprehensive list or directory of places to chat and I’ll post it to this website when it’s completed.

(For those guys that don’t know, Chat and Forums are two different things. Chat is real time, whilst forums are message boards where the conversation, topic or posts can last for quite some time.)

Short List of A Few Popular Gay Chat Sites & Chat Rooms:

All of these chat sites require registration — some may cost extra for full benefits.

Discort Gay Chat — Yes, there’s also quite a few gay chats going on here. See my note above…

Free Chat Now— Yes, there’s lots of gay chats and networking going on here.

Telegram Gay Chat— Predominately straight chat portal with quite a few gay chat rooms and chat boards.

Slack Gay Chat — Predominately straight chat portal with quite a few gay chat rooms and chat boards. Look in the Adult and Romance areas for the gay chat rooms…

Also, check out my recommended dating sites for more chat rooms. I should also mention that many of the gay community sites that I feature at my gay links site have chat rooms as well.

Now go and have yourself a bit of fun!

What is FTM?

The border between intersex (hermaphrodites) and transsexuals is very fluent. In fact it can be argued that both are two sides of the same phenomena: during the early devellopment of the fetus the body develloped in a nonstandard way, making it difficult for third persons to guess the gender of the baby after birth.

In the FTM case a child has mistakenly (if the psychological identity is used as defining standart) been labeled and assigned as female at birth.

During childhood, adolescence but usually only as an adult the FTM corrects this mistake and lives as a man.

This can be a disruptive process as parents, friends, employers are often relucutant to aceept that their perception of this person was incorrect. Usually after some time most people do adapt, also because it is easier to relate to a FTM as a man.

Hormones, surgery or a legal court order are usually nessesary to achive a complete recognition by society. Many countries, smore health organisations unfortunately still discriminate against FTMs, and intersex and transgendered people in general.

Many FTMs have started to explore ways which lead to a recognition without surgery, especially FTMs who pass as boys or young men without any medical intervention. Others have explored bi-gendered ways, bluring the border between the gay/lesbian and transgender population.

The abreviation FTM is derived from the medical term female to male (transgender, transsexual, etc.). As most FTMs have no serious medical disorders related to their condition, FTM and intersex people who match this statement should however rather seen as a part of the rich heritage of human diversity, which has produced differnt races, bodyshapes, and on a higher level ethinically diverse cultures.

Lesbian Prime Minister Walks in Belgrade Pride

Serbian Prime Minister Ana Brnabić marched in Belgrade Pride today.

The openly-lesbian Prime Minister is the first leader to ever march in a Balkan Pride event.

In a speech on the day, she said: ‘Many criticize me.

‘As a representative of the state, I am proud that our country has adopted anti-discrimination laws.

‘The level of discrimination of minority groups and members of national communities is in decline,’ she added.

‘The answer to the expression of hatred must be something else’

In a powerful message of solidarity to Serbian LGBTI people, Ana Brnabić said: ‘After an undoubted decrease in the number of physical attacks on people who are different from the majority, it is equally important that we stop hurting ourselves with words.

‘No matter how much pain a slap in the face may cause, the weight of a word is often far more painful,’ she said.

Serbian folk singer and human rights activist Jelena Karleua also joined the march.

She wrote on Instagram: ‘And you who hate and write sick comments full of hate, you are guilty.

17 September 2017

Finding Out Where All the Gay Men Are

One of the problems that a lot of guys have and are asking me about is where they can find other gay men — besides at the online personals sites.

Most of the guys that ask this question have one or more of the following characteristics:

1. They live in a smaller city, when compared to the BIG cities.

2. They’re usually not “Out” or they’ve only been out for a short while and don’t have many gay friends.

3. They think they’re the only gay person in their area.

Tune up your Gaydar, because regardless of your circumstances and regardless of where you live we’re going to take a look at some of the ways you can find out where all the gay men in your area hang out.

Now I do realize that it’s possible to live in a town where there’s next to no gay men around or at least none that are available. I have lived in some really small towns – three and four digit populations… So, you may have to take the occasional trip to your nearest large town in order to find any sizable gay population.

The first thing you need to do is take a good hard look at the city or town that you do live in. I had a boyfriend who claimed that there were no gay bars or gay organizations in his town. I couldn’t believe it because he lived in a University town and one of the Universities or Colleges had a major arts program…

Sure those aren’t proof that there’s got to be some gays out there, but my Gaydar says that those are indications that there’s going to be a few gays hanging around town. A quick flick through the local phone book confirmed my suspicions. Three gay bars, (one of them was a leather bar), a couple of gay book stores, the campus Pride Society – all in a “conservative mid-west state town”.

The phone book or Yellow Pages is a great resource. Whenever I’m traveling, one of the first things I do when I arrive or stop off in a city, is check out the phone book for gay book stores and gay bars.

Another resource that I’ve found invaluable is gay book stores. In addition to finding good reading material or a cute book store owner, employee or fellow gay bookworm, gay book stores often sell or give away “Pink Pages”. What are Pink Pages? They’re like the Yellow Pages, only geared towards the Gay and Lesbian community. Sometimes the Pink Pages are brochure sized, others are larger – booklet sized publications.

Speaking of the Pink Pages, there’s numerous Pink Pages on the web – many that are specific to certain cities or regions. Go to your favorite search engine, type in “Pink Pages” or try “Pink Pages and The City That You Live In”. (Skip the quotation marks.)

Two last points about gay book stores… Check out the inevitable bulletin board AND ask the clerk where the gay hot spots are. Also ask him about the special events, Pride festivals or social clubs and groups that happen and meet in your area.

Another place that you should check out is your local PFLAG chapter, (Parents, Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). In the U.S. pflag.org is the site to visit. You can find out where your local chapter is, find out more about gender identity and sexual orientation as well as some great tips on coming out. In Canada, pflag.ca is the site to go to.

Once you start doing a little research you’ll begin finding out about the places to go to. You’ll find that there are more opportunities than meet the eye – you may even find that there’s a much larger and vibrant gay community than you suspected. That’s when you’ll start meeting other gay men or at the very least the opportunity to meet them.

Lesbian Muslim Runs for Atlanta City Council

Liliana Bakhtiari was born in Atlanta Georgia and attended her first protest march when she was 8 years old.

Liliana’s father is a first generation Iranian immigrant that engaged in community service and acts of social justice. Her mother put Liliana’s father through university where he became a pharmacist. Working as a young person in her father’s pharmacy, Liliana was exposed to the poverty of Sweet Auburn, a district of Atlanta. Her father made medicine affordable to people who could not access it.

She is now running for Atlanta City Council.

Facing Racism in School

In various interviews, Liliana reports the hurtful racism that she endured in school. In high school racist taunts such as “how many goats would she be worth on her wedding day?” Due to traditional practises, Liliana was not allowed to shave her legs or trim her eye brows. These practises only added to the racism she endured.

University a Place of Shelter and Education

State of Georgia

At Georgia State University, Liliana felt freedom and equality amongst her peers. It was in Liliana’s nature to travel and volunteer. To date, she has visited 22 countries in Africa, Asia, Australia and Central and South America.

Travelling was dedicated work that involved working with genocide and sex trafficking victims in Cambodia.

She has worked with torture victims and refugees in Thailand, Vietnam and Laos. Liliana is the type of person who works physically, emotionally and mentally. She is a ‘hands on’ person who has been involved in the building of houses and composting toilets. On her journeys she became concerned about food accessibility and water scarcity. Being involved in this type of work changes a person for ever. I have personally known volunteers that could not adjust to their return to first world consumerism and the apathy towards developing countries and their economic problems.

Liliana Returns to Atlantic and Activism

Liliana was upset with the gap between her state of Georgia’s rich, middle class and very poor. She noticed the plight of the homeless and lack of affordable housing. Public transportation was in need of upgrading as were the needs of the jobless and senior citizens.

One of her ventures was serving on the board of Lost-n-Found Youth, a nonprofit organization that works with homeless LGBTI youths.

At home, Bakhtiari continued her activism, advocating for underserved communities and serving on the board of Lost-n-Found Youth, a nonprofit that works with homeless LGBTI youths.

Running for Office

It is Liliana’s hope that if elected for public office she can make a difference to the problems that she been actively engaged in. Liliana knows that it will be challenging for her as a woman, a Muslim and a lesbian.

She states that President Trump is a direct attack of all these three things that identify her. He attacks women, Muslims and encourages the extreme right-wing evangelicals to discriminate against LGBTI persons through “religious freedom.”

I wish Liliana every success in her crusade against injustice as it affects minorities, the poor, seniors, the jobless, the homeless, Muslims and other religious minorities and lastly the LGBTI community.

 

Lesbian women are more accepted than gay men

Researchers who studied attitudes towards non-heterosexual men and women suggested that in 23 countries gay men are less “accepted” than lesbian women.

In the research of a group of scientists from New York University published in the journal Social Psychology and Personality Science, “We found that in every country we tested, gays were less attracted to lesbians.”

Director of the study, Maria Laura Bettinsoli, together with her teammates, expressed their surprise that “the consistency of the relationship between the acceptance of gender norms and sexual bias is unexpected”.

The study also found that strong gender norms were associated with higher tolerance for homosexuality in some Eastern countries, including China and India as an exception.

In these Eastern countries, it was seen that “gender norms and homosexuality are perceived as ‘Western concepts’ and that pro-Western people approach both positively”.
“Men are both perpetrators and targets of sexual prejudice”

According to the scientists, the findings of the study show that men are “more likely to be perpetrators and targets of sexual bias.”

Brazil, China, Hungary, Japan, Peru, Poland, Russia, South Africa, attitudes toward sexual minorities is in North Korea and Turkey more negative than in the US.

At the end of the study, the researchers said, “This study should be a springboard for research focused on the conceptualization of gender and sexuality in poorly educated societies and how they are conceptualized in the Western world.”

 

Best Lesbian Movies

Cinema films stand out among the cultural productions that deal with social and political issues and they have tried to give a message to people. Lesbian movies that once again prove that love is far beyond gender stereotypes.

It is about a maid’s secret love for her lady who is hired by a crook. In the story set in the 1930s, a crook who introduces himself as the Count plans to make him fall in love with him to seize the wealth of the mysterious and naive-looking Japanese heir, Lady Hideko. He hires Sook-hee as a maid to the Lady to help her. But it will be messy for this maid to fall in love with her unaware lady …

There are two things that 15-year-old Adele is sure of; she is a girl and girls date boys she. One day she notices Emma’s blue hair in the big square and then realizes that her life will change. All alone with her own adolescent questions, she turns her gaze to herself and the gaze of others to herself. She lives in love with Emma as a woman, as an adult. But Adele is unable to make peace with herself, with her family, or with this absurd world.

The Favorite is about the struggle between Queen Anne’s right-hand man, Lady Sarah, and the new maid, Abigail. While the poor Queen Anne sits on the throne of the country, her advisor and secret lover, Sarah Churchill, the Duchess of Marlborough, deals with the queen’s deteriorating health and her changeable temperament, while also ruling the country instead. Newly arrived maid, Abigail, impresses herself with Lady Sarah with her charming. When Sarah takes Abigail under her wing, Abigail also gets a chance to return to her aristocratic roots. When the politics of war become too time-consuming for Sarah, Abigail takes on the task of being the queen’s friend. Their commendable friendship gives Abigail a chance to fulfill her ambitions. Abigail will no longer allow any woman, man or political move to get in her way …

Adepero Oduye Alike is a 17-year-old girl who lives in Brooklyn with her mother Audrey, father Arthur and younger sister Sharonda. Alike, who has to live in an environment where she does not feel belonging, tries to discover her own sexual identity. Alike, who accepts her sexual orientation and tries to live accordingly, encounters the pressure of her environment and society. Not sure how much she can pour into her family, Alike is determined to overcome her problems with honor, joy and determination. a

Carol is a well-known figure in New York in the 1950s. She wants a divorce from her husband and fights for the custody of her daughter. Therese works in a boutique. The paths of these two worldly women, Carol and Therese, intersect in this luxury boutique in Manhattan. As soon as Carol sees Therese, she is struck by the young woman’s beauty. But there is no place for this forbidden love in Carol’s community yet.

Carmen y Lola tells the story of two women trying to live their love despite all difficulties.

Nic and Jules are a married lesbian couple living in California. Through artificial insemination using sperm donation, both have a child. Kids named Joni and Laser want to meet their real fathers when they reach puberty. The donor named Paul, whom they reach out using their rights, finds out that they are their father and arranges a meeting with him. The three meet at Paul’s workplace. Laser, who wanted to meet Paul at first, was not very pleased after the meeting, but Paul’s bohemian life attracted Joni. Things unfold when Paul meets Nic and Jules, whom he is a donor.

The Swedish-made lesbian-themed movie is about the story of two women named Mia and Frida who met at their parents’ engagement. While Mia’s father, Lasse, marries Frida’s mother, two women in their thirties inevitably become half-sisters. The two, who started to spend time together, will gradually start to like each other and this closeness will cause dramatic results.

16-year-old Cyd, who was severely traumatized as a child, goes to Chicago to spend the summer with his aunt Spence. Cyd, who has the opportunity to get to know his aunt who is a writer better during the summer break, meets Katie, who works at a coffee shop. Cyd soon begins to be attracted to someone and begins to question many things about sexuality. In this film, Stephen Cone is about a woman stepping into the real world with natural acting and unexpected poetry.

Disobedience is based on a woman named Esti Kuperman (Rachel Weisz). After the death of his former rabbi father, Esti returns to his Orthodox Jewish family home in London. However, the life he has established for himself and the beliefs of his family and environment are now different. This conflict of belief will surface when Esti begins to take an interest in her childhood friend (Rachel McAdams), whom she sees again.

When the engaged young woman meets her best friend’s girlfriend, her life changes completely.

Kena and Ziki are two quite different young girls living in Nairobi residences. In a conservative society, young people who approach each other lovingly against the political rivalry between their families struggle together to realize their dreams. But when Kena and Ziki fall in love, they have to make a difficult choice.

Snapshots tell the story of 3 generations. Her granddaughter finds a roll of film and the grandmother remembers her love for her best girlfriend in the past.

Nina, a teacher in her 30s, is looking for a surrogate mother with her husband, now that they want to have children. Eventually they find a suitable candidate, but Nina falls in love with the woman who will give birth to her child.

Alba and Natasha’s paths cross in Rome on the night of December 22nd. Choosing an ordinary hotel room for themselves, these two young women will tell each other about their lives, share their most secret secrets and discover each other’s bodies during the night. For both, tonight will be an adventure of self-discovery, but it will remain a secret that only them know for life.

Tell It to the Bees chronicles the love of a single mother abandoned by her husband and a doctor who recently returned to her old town. Lydia, who tragically ended her marriage, knocks on Jean’s door after her child Charlie was attacked at school, and the story begins …

32-year-old Lizzie is an unmarried woman forced to live under her father’s unpretentious and authoritarian control. However, this situation begins to change with the arrival of young maid Bridget Sullivan. While Lizzie gets the chance to get closer to young Bridget with a likeable, kind spirit, Bridget doesn’t leave her feelings unrequited. However, the story of the two began to evolve towards a dark, disturbing ending. It’s going to be extremely difficult for Lizzie who gets the chance to unleash her emotions with this relationship.

The sudden passionate love affair between Jasmine and Dallas will radically change the lives of both women.

Based on a true story, “Vita & Virginia” explores the passionate relationship between one of the most successful writers in literary history, Virginia Woolf (Elizabeth Debicki) and the mysterious aristocrat Vita Sackville-West (Gemma Arterton). When the two cross paths, Vita decides that Virginia will be his new conquest, no matter the cost. The fruit of the relationship that began between the glamorous Vita and the charming, stubborn and talented Virginia is Woolf’s daring and experimental novel “Orlando.”

Does Islam Support the Burning of Homosexuals?

I read that a 2015 Moroccan magazine cover asked the question “Should homosexuals be burned?

Is burning considered as a means of execution in 2015?

Here is the answer from a Question and Answer Islamic site: islamqa.info/en/38622

Below is the question asked on this website.

What is the punishment for homosexuality? Is there any differentiation between the one who does it and the one to whom it is done?.

Here is the answer from the site (not the entire article as it contained scholars meetings over the years on this topic.

The crime of homosexuality is one of the greatest of crimes, the worst of sins and the most abhorrent of deeds, and Allaah punished those who did it in a way that He did not punish other nations. It is indicative of violation of the fitrah, total misguidance, weak intellect and lack of religious commitment, and it is a sign of doom and deprivation of the mercy of Allaah. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound.

The crime of homosexuality is one of the greatest of crimes, the worst of sins and the most abhorrent of deeds, and Allaah punished those who did it in a way that He did not punish other nations. It is indicative of violation of the fitrah, total misguidance, weak intellect and lack of religious commitment, and it is a sign of doom and deprivation of the mercy of Allaah. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound.

Are There Exceptions to Execution? (My question)

Here is the answer from the Site

1 – There is no hadd punishment if the one who has been sodomized is forced into it, such as if the one who did it overpowered him or threatened him with death or beating and the like. End quote.

2 – If the one to whom it was done is a minor and has not reached the age of puberty. There is no hadd punishment in this case, but he should be disciplined and punished in a way that will deter him from committing this crime, as stated above in the quotation from Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah.

Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) narrated in al-Mughni (9/62) that there is no difference of opinion among the scholars concerning the fact that the hadd punishment should not be carried out on one who is insane or a boy who has not yet reached the age of puberty.

And Allaah knows best.

End of Article.

My comment:

Unknown-6paula: I cannot see Allaah as a God of such hatred towards his creation. Like so many religions that were founded long ago, there is no room for scientific thought. World-wide bodies of psychologists and psychiatrists are in total agreement that homosexuality is a born orientation.

They state that homosexuality is NOT a disease, mental problem or perversion (as stated in the Quran and the Old Testament). Furthermore, they state that homosexuality CANNOT be reversed and therefore, it is NOT a choice.

Would a God punish people born homosexuality. It is my opinion that He/She would not. It is my opinion, as I read this site that the emphasis is on DEATH and ways of executing and NOT on LOVE. It is on judging people born homosexual. Has it never occurred to these bigots that homosexuality has been in existence since the dawn of civilization? Are they blind to the fact that homosexuality is in EVERY country? My God is a God of love.

Paula, 2015, stories4hotbloodedlesbians.com

Moroccan Magazine Cover: Should Gays Be Burned?

A magazine cover which asked “should gay people be burned” has been withdrawn. In view of the United Nations Charter of Rights and Freedoms – NO religion or culture has the right to take away basic human rights and these include sexual orientation. Extreme and hateful religious fanatics are portraying God as a God of wrath – instead of a God of love. These bigots use ancient texts and avoid scientific data. Paula.

A Magazine That Should Face a Law Suit?

The cover of Maroc Hebdo posed the question in response to the Moroccan Ministry of Health’s call for homosexuality to be decriminalised.

It also asked “What about moral and religious values?”

Within the magazine, which has now been withdrawn from sale, there were three articles – one which outline the situation for gay people in Morocco, an interview with pro-gay activist Abdellah Taia, and a piece by staff writer Mustapha Sehimi.

Staff Writer is Ignorant of Scientific Data

Sehimi writes: “Today, more than 70 states forbid homosexuality. In around ten of them, the sentence gay people risk death penalty.

“There is a public moral to preserve… religious values too… There is still a lot to do to strenghten human rights in Morocco so we don’t have to be misled into some dubious fight for such a marginal purpose as decriminalization of homosexuality.”

After the cover was published, many took to social media to point out that the photograph of two men featured on the magazine’s cover was actually taken at a gay-friendly hotel in Cancun.

Others simply took to Facebook to ask questions like: “Are you stupid”, and “Your covers are the worst.”

Others tweeted their distaste at the cover, calling it “criminal”, “irresponsible” and “shameful”.

In a statement Maroc Hebdo said: “Given the particularly strong reactions through social media, Morocco Hebdo decided to withdraw this issue from sale and its sites on the internet.

“It presents at the same time its apologies to all readers who were offended by this theme and it stresses it has no other requirement other than to continue to work for the expansion of a national debate on… the shape of society.”

Paula: What is there to debate? Human rights should trump any religion. The debate, since it will continue, should present the findings of most psychological and psychiatric associations world-wide. They write that homosexuality is not a disease, mental condition or PERVERSION (as stated by right wing religious zealots). They also state that homosexuality CANNOT be changed, therefore, it is NOT a choice.

If religions are to raise the soul towards heaven why do they persecute someone who is born a homosexual. This is NOT God-like. This is not loving God’s creation.

Paula, 2015, stories4hotbloodedlesbians.com